Olivia Rowlatt

Sex and Relationship Therapist (COSRT Accredited)

Mindful touch

What is mindful touch?

Touch is communication on the most basic level.

Touch is a necessity throughout life. It sustains emotionally and physically.

Touch is about how you relate to yourself.

Mindful touch is paying attention to sensations, emotions, physical experiences, thoughts in the moment of touching.

Relationship therapy is about people. Touch is an important part of communication. Mindful touch is being aware of what you are feeling. Couples sometimes think more about pleasing each other. Sex therapy invites you to be present in your body in the moment. Learning about mindful touch increases your pleasure. It increases your sexual response. Try using curiousity. Consider touching as an adventure.

Try this simple exercise:

  • Take one hand in the other.
  • Close your eyes and put your attention into your hands.
  • Notice the weight, temperature, texture of your hand.
  • Try stroking your hand.
  • Tap your hand varying the intensity.
  • Explore each finger individually.

In this way you bring your attention back to your body and this moment.

Mindfulness is being in touch and aware of the present moment. It involves a non-judgmental approach to your inner experience.

Bring your attention to the things you touch in your life everyday.

  • Bring your attention to your actual experience when you touch your partner.
  • Let go of expectations about how you or your partner should respond to touch.
  • Be curious.
  • Try different kinds of touch.

In this way touching becomes an adventure!! Re-introduce play into your touch!!

Call or email to find out more about how mindful touch can help your sex life.

“One of the most basic elements of sexuality, touch, integrates the language of sexuality and attachment. Touch arouses and it also soothes and comforts”.

Johnson and Zuccarini [2010]